Tuesday, February 10, 2009

The Day Before The Day

Yes. Today is the day...before the day. The dreaded "prep" day before the stinkin' colonoscopy. It is supposed to be really icky. I am not excited. So, to get through all this, I'm going to blog it. Sorry. If it's too much for you...turn away!

Ok...so, the first thing...yesterday I picked up the MASSIVE container of nasty liquid I'm supposed to drink. It is a delightful mix of sodium bicarbonate (baking soda) and sodium chloride (salt). I am to consume 4 LITERS throughout the day. They have thoughtfully included flavor packets to mix in, which may be worse in the long run. But, wait...I'm getting carried away!

I'll start my morning with two fabulous laxative pills, chased with a beverage of my choosing. It will be Coke. Then, starting at noon, I begin drinking the salty goodness...an 8oz glass every 15 minutes. My plan is to chase the nastiness with another beverage of choice. Again, Coke. If I get hungry throughout the day, I can indulge in a luscious bowl of Jello. As much as I want! But not red, it dyes your insides. Did you know?

From then on, I'll spend the rest of the day...in the bathroom. I'll spare you the details...you're welcome. I situated a stack of books and a pile of TP in my favorite bathroom for hours of "leisurely" reading.
I'll end my day with a dinner of chicken broth and...more jello.

Yay. Aren't you jealous?

By the way, I'm sure you've heard that your colon can hold something like 15lbs of old, well, stuff in it? I'm testing this theory by weighing myself before and after the "cleansing". If I lose 15lbs today, it might all be worth it...right?

13 comments:

Lissaloo said...

That sounds like torture um I mean fun :) The drink sounds awful! Did your Dr recommend the colonoscopy? I'm just curious, I have been hearing a lot about people getting this done & was kind of wondering why? It sounds like you prepared well for the prep day :)

Kristina P. said...

Wow, how delightful! You're right. A snuggie would make it better.

Bethany and Cameron said...

Oh Erica....I am just so sorry. That's all I can think to say! Lemme know about the weight loss--I may hafta look into that!:) Good luck with the whole thing! Lemme know what I can do for you!

Jami said...

Ugh! It just sounds horrible, I'm so sorry. Keeping you in my thoughts today and tomorrow!

Jaime said...

That is so nasty. I'm so sorry. Dh had this done. I think the prep day was the worst. Since tomorrow they'll probably give you drugs that will make you not remember the actual scope. I talked to dh right after his procedure and then later he didn't even remember talking to me. Ha ha!

Nana Trish is Living the Dream said...

I hope everything turned out alright. I have had one and after all it wasn't that bad. I will pray everything is going well.

Romney family said...

erica. girl. i have had one of those! now please let me help you. i know we dont really "know" each other, but you gotta trust me! the crap you take and drink is THE WORST of the entire thing!! i swear. it sucks so bad and you will be very nervous going on, but its so easy once you go in. you put on a robe. they should give you an iv. they give you stuff that calms you, and makes you sleepy and feel really good! they say you dont go completely to sleep but i think i did. i laid there smiling and laughing. next thing i knew they said get dressed. you are done. i walked out and never ever felt pain or discomfort. i was a lil sleepy. anyway. you will be fine! you just gotta get throught he gross crap before. good luck!!

Lavinia said...

Oh dear. I hope I never have to face this. Be strong! This too shall pass...(no pun intended).

I'd be happy to send you the image of the shepherd boy, please let me know your email address and will do.....

Nikki said...

I am a little late reading blogs. How did it go today?

beth said...

so....how did it go????

My dad had one Monday...must be in the air....or something....

Mike should tell you about his....it's a very funny story..

Romney family said...

oh ha ha. I think I totally missed when you said you were having it done. which means I posted after you already had it?? wow. I am on top of things. hope it went well

Darce said...

I've had to go thru something like that and it was absolutely no fun! The only thing that made it doable was thinking that I was possibly losing weight! Anyway, you wrote that so well! I laughed the whole way through! And, I'm glad to know you survived!

Nick and Aubrey said...

I remember the "cleansing" day before my surgery. It wasnt 4 liters of the stuff (thank goodness) but that didn't make it much better. I hope things are going well for you! Still catching up on the blogs so I'll keep reading!!!