Saturday, May 07, 2005

Happy Guilt Day!

Since I became a mother, I have always kind of dreaded Mothers Day. Every year, they have people speak in church, telling about how perfect and great their mom's were. About their great examples and how much they learned from their sainted mothers. To me, it feels like something that I just can't live up to. As I sit there listening, the guilt just starts to build, until I want to hop out of my chair and run to the car for a good cry. Then come the flowers for the mothers. Sometimes, they hand out carnations, which are nice, but other years, they hand out flowers that we're to go home and plant. I would like to know the statistics of flowers planted versus flowers left to die on the kitchen counter. You can guess where mine end up! More guilt!

Why is it that women can never be happy with who they are and what they do? I feel like I really do my best with my kids, but I can't help compare myself to others who I think are doing a better job than me. This is something I need to work on.

Tomorrow, I will just enjoy my waffles in bed and handmade presents from my kids. At church, I'll zone out the talks and just be happy as my 4 year old son stands with the rest of the kids singing to their mothers. I will try to feel none of the guilt, and all of the love.

I hope all of you have a wonderful, guilt-free day!


Anonymous said...

You should not feel guilty. If you think that because your hearing only good things about other people's mothers means that they are in reality perfect, then your smoking something. Your kids will probably do the same for you.

I think you enjoy having this guilt because you get to be the victum. You must be getting some kind of reward for feeling this way, otherwise you wouldn't do it. Perhaps you should think about where that reward is coming from and stop it. Then put the energy in to something useful.

drama mama said...

Thanks Anonymous! I feel a lot better now!

jb said...

LOL! I'm glad because for some reason our ward has a tradition of giving the moms chocolates rather than the potted (fated) plant. I know what you mean about the talks. But I've come to the conclusion that most people put on a front at church. And that comforts me. :)

peebugg said...

Okay...I have my comment on the perfect MOM speeches.

AJ's girlfriend gave one of those speeches at church on Sunday. She had her dad help her write it. It praised her mother as all the other speeches do, but it was untrue.

I honestly believe that these speeches are given with the best intentions to show their mothers how much they care, but they are not true accounts.

Those children that have truely wonderful mothers, don't have to get up infront of the congration and make a speech the world already knows it and so do the kids.

So, as a compliment to you, we already know your a great mom, we can see it in your boys' eyes.